What Having a Baby Taught Me about Friendship

Baby boy

Of course I’m feeling the creative writing juices flowing at 10:54 on a Thursday night, when I should be sleeping because baby boy is sleeping. Whenever that child is sleeping, the timer starts. Am I right moms? That baby will eventually need me, he’ll need food (breastfeeding mom here!). He hasn’t taken a bottle yet, but I’m hoping to conquer that soon. Anyways, he’ll need me soon, that invisible timer is always running, setting and resetting. So I should be sleeping and not writing (typing), but here I am!

There are so many blog topics that have worked through my brain since becoming a mom. Where do I even start? Well how about the day we came home from the hospital with our little man in tow. We walk in the back door and there is food everywhere, in the best way. Both our moms dropped groceries off for us. What a godsend. There was even a baby gift waiting in the crib. I could have cried. And that was only the beginning.

I cannot tell you how many people have given us baby clothes and books and swaddles and blankets, and dropped us off food. The cards we received, along with all the diapers (thanks Aunt Kelci! And to everyone that participated in our “diaper bomb”). The love and generosity we felt, and still feel, is overwhelming. Close family and friends have supported us along with friends of our parents, new neighbors, people we haven’t seen in a while; our people are the best kind of people! Matt and I say it on a regular basis, we are so blessed.

Before I had my son, I had no clue how to be a friend for my friends when they had babies. To be honest, I always felt a little helpless. They had the hard job of caring for the little one, what could I do? 

What I know now is this, just ask. And this goes for anyone going through a life change. Just ask what they need. May I drop off food? Do you need a coffee? May I come by and chat and keep you company? A kind gesture with sincere intentions will go a long way. But for a new mom, holding the baby for 20 minutes while she showers is life changing.

Show up. That’s what I’ve learned; make the step, reach out. I never knew that having a baby would teach me so much about myself, and highlight the areas where I needed to grow. And that it would also show me a different kind of love.